Chapter 31
It’s been two days since our minds were blown away by new revelations. The more things were revealed, the more complicated they became. It seemed like we were wrong about so many things. The only thing that we were right about was the damn curse.
I push Knox harder as he runs through the trees, dodging branches and roots. Our minds were a total f**g mess and everything was just jumbled.
We were still reeling from the knowledge that Lola wasn’t our fated mate. Just like I loved Lola, Knox loved her wolf. The bond we felt with the two of them was too real to be faked. How can it be when we
felt every damn thing with her?
Pushing those thoughts away, Knox increases his speed. The wind blew against his black fur as we tried our hardest to escape the phantoms of the past.
It took about ten minutes before we skidded to a stop at a cliff. Slowly approaching the edge, he takes his time before finally stopping all together. We stare below before our eyes rise to meet the moon. It’s a crescent moon, and for some reason, I feel like the moon goddess is mocking me. This is the shape my mate’s mark is supposed to be, yet we had no idea.
“What are you thinking, Knox? You’re quiet,” I asked him.
He’s blocking me. Hiding his thoughts from me.
He doesn’t say anything for some time, but when he does, I can feel the confusion and heartache in
his voice.
“Do you
think she deceived us?” I don’t need to be told who he’s talking about. “Everything points to that being the case, but my heart wants to believe that she didn’t. Maybe she was used or some **t
like that.”
I knew one way or another, it would lead to Lola. For three years, we have thought about nothing but the pack and Lola.
It’s been three f**g years, and yet we haven’t found anything that would guide us to where Lola could be… Or what happened to her.
No one has seen or heard from her. She had very few friends, and those friends disappeared when she
did.
Chapter 31
Three years without a word about her or from her. It’s been f**g killing us slowly, and now we find out that she wasn’t even our fated mate?
We mourned her loss. Mourned the loss of our bond. Agonized over the rejection and held hope that one day we would win her back. All that pain we’ve endured only for us to be told that we weren’t even meant to be. We just don’t know how to f**g deal with that.
When the elders told me that I would get a second chance mate, I didn’t really have a problem with that. Mainly because, in my heart, Lola would always remain my first and fated mate. It’s some kind of
torture to find out that she isn’t even our mate.
“We know Lola, Knox. She’s sweet, kind and caring. She’s a representation of what a good person is. I don’t for one second believe that she would deceive us,” I finally responded.
“If that’s the case, then where is she? How come we haven’t been able to find her all these years? Why did she disappear?”
That was the million-dollar question. Where the f**k did she disappear? I get the need to escape your heartache, but to disappear without a trace-that is weird, to say the least.
“I honestly don’t know.”
We remained quiet after that. Both of us lost in our own thoughts. Knox drops on his belly and lies on the ground with his head on his paws. The winds continue raging outside while a different kind of storm rages inside us.
He closes his eyes, feeling the wind brush against our fur. It was peaceful here. This is the one place we come to when we want to think. When we want to be away from the chaos in the pack. The one place where we can find peace, even if it’s for only a few hours.
I use this time to think about what’s to be done. Hunter was right. We needed more alliances. We
true needed to speak with the Alpha of the Hope pack. It’s not that I don’t have faith in finding my fated mate, but with how everything has gone wrong, it’s always good to have a backup plan.
“We need to go back and start preparations,” I said, breaking the silence after we’d been there for
some time.
Thankfully, Knox doesn’t argue. He just stood up and started the trot back home. Despite everything, we felt more at ease. I know it’s only for a while before restlessness takes over, but it was still f**g worth it coming here.
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“How do you imagine our new mate will be?” Knox asked.
“I haven’t really thought about it,” I answered, not really in the mood to talk about a new mate.
Deep down, I know it’s a **g lie, though. I’ve thought about it, and I just can’t imagine it at all.
“Honestly, I don’t think there is anyone that can match Lola… I don’t know if I’m ready to accept a new mate, not when my heart still beats for Ama.” He whimpered, voicing the silent thoughts I’ve been struggling with since learning the truth.
His voice breaks a little when he mentions Lola’s wolf. I want to comfort him, but I don’t really know how. We’ve carried Lola and Ama in our hearts for so f**g long that we don’t know how to let go. Even after all these years, they are still imprinted on our souls.
“We don’t have a choice, Knox. We have to accept the new she-wolf if we want to stand a chance at
saving our pack.”
“I get that, but how can we be a true mate to her if we haven’t let go of our former one. It’ll be unfair
to them.”
my He was starting to give me a f**g headache. I didn’t want to think about it. I already felt like soul had been stripped raw. This wasn’t the time to think of that when we hadn’t even found her.
“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there,” I mumbled tersely.
Shaking his head, he scoffs. “You’re trying to evade the matter.”
“What do you want me to f**g say, Knox? That I’m afraid of hurting her, which we f**g will because someone else has already claimed our heart. At this point, I know we’ll just be using her because we can’t fully love and commit to her.
I don’t want to think about it because I know we’ll break her heart, and she doesn’t deserve that. I’m afraid that we’ll grow to resent her since she’s not who we want, and, most importantly, I’m afraid she’ll refuse to help us once she figures out that, apart from what she can do for us, we don’t really
want her.”
F**k! Why was the moon goddess messing with us? We are taught from birth to trust in her and her
ago. ways, but I’m beginning to think she abandoned us a long time
Knox is quiet as we reach the pack house. Sprinting up the stairs, we rushed to our bedroom. After shifting back to human form, I took a quick shower, put on some clothes, and then headed to my
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Chapter 31
office.
Opening the door, I found Jason and Micah already seated. I’d mind linked them to meet me at the office while I was showering.
“So what’s up?” Jason asked. “You seemed a little tense when you asked us to meet you.”
Sighing, I rounded the table and took my seat. “I need one of you to get ready. We are leaving for The Hope Pack in three days. We need an alliance with them.”
They look at me with their jaws dropped. I get them. I’m never one to go looking for alliances, but like I said, this was just in case things don’t go as planned… And for some damn reason, I feel like nothing will go as planned