Chapter 119
FREDA WHITLOCK
I sat still in the car, pressing my lips together as I drove on the way to the school. My heart was racing in my chest, I was barely breathing and my fingers were wrapped around the steering wheel so hard that my knuckles were white. I still had a ten- minute drive ahead of me, and I was already feeling like I would fall apart. I took in a deep breath and let out a sigh.
“Freda,” Kaiden called my name quietly, breaking the
uncomfortable silence we had been in… More like I had been in. I had glanced at him from the corner of my eyes a number of times and he seemed relaxed in his seat.
My wolf whined in my head, and I realized that it was the first time she was communicating with me in almost two weeks. I did not know how to feel about that. I loved my wolf, but I still felt betrayed and hurt by the fact that she had abandoned me when I needed her the most, and then she had gone into hiding.
I did not know how to feel about the fact that she was choosing now of all **n times to act giddy and disorient me while I was trying to gather my s**t together.
“You need to calm down, or you’ll get us killed,” he said in a relaxed tone, and I looked at him. “What?” I questioned, wanting to be sure I heard him right. “Calm down, or you will crash this car into the forest,” he said, and I glared at him before I pressed my lips together.
Chapter 119
“I’m calm. I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said. It was crazy how easy it was for him to get under my d** skin. He could very easily drive me nuts and he would smile about it. “Would you look at that?” He said with a chuckle, leaning back in his seat and then glancing back at me before looking out through the windshield again.
“What?” I fumed. “You’re above the speed limit. There are barely any cars on this road at this time, but anything can happen, and you will be the reason we’re f****ck**ter and found that I was speeding. In my annoyance, I had pressed my foot to the gas pedal and I had not even. noticed.
“Can you please be quiet for the rest of the ride?” I pleaded, taking deep breaths so that my blood would not boil to the point where I breathed fire. “I can do whatever I want, Freda. You need to stop being so tense around me,” he responded with a sigh.
“Maybe I don’t want you around me,” I exclaimed and the hurt that crossed his face and then disappeared behind the shield of coldness that he put up next filled me with guilt.
My wolf growled in the back of my mind, and I felt the strong need to asphyxiate her and get rid of her since she wanted to be so d**n useless.
‘How dare you?’ she spat at me. ‘You know I can read your mind, right?” she asked and I said nothing in response.
“… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I invited you into my car. I’m not being reasonable,” I apologized to Kaiden with rushed words and he said nothing in response. That filled me with guilt.
my
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He had been excited about seeing Francisco. What if coldness and unkindness chased him away? What if he stopped making efforts for Francisco because he could no longer stand my rotten attitude?
I was being incredibly selfish.
F**g hell… This was difficult. It was really difficult. I had thought I would be able to accept him as my son’s father and leave my grudges and sigh him out of that area, but I could not help it, and I was only just realizing.
“S-say something, Kaiden,” I sighed and he chuckled, but there was not a single trace of amusement in his voice. “What do you want me to say, Freda?” He asked. He sounded almost tired.
Maybe he was. He did look both sick and tired.
I bit my lip and contemplated the right words to say. “Look, please don’t be upset with Francisco or leave him alone. because of this. The problems are between us, not you and him.” I said and he looked at me. My skin started to heat up because I could feel where his eyes were going. I could feel his eyes like they were the feathery touch of fingertips.
I bit my lip and kept my eyes on the road, clenching my hand around the steering wheel. “I’m not a child Freda. I know how to separate my problems. You’ve given me your permission to be Francisco’s father. I didn’t need it, but I just want you to know that not even your attitude can change the love I have for him,” he responded just as I drove through the gate and to the parking lot.
I bit my lip and said nothing in response. I killed the engine and we both sat in silence. We could hear the noise of the jolly
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music coming from the party and the children laughing, playing, and chattering. “You ready?” He asked and I looked at him before nodding once.
“Come on,” he said and climbed out of the car. I followed suit.
******
I watched Harper, Francisco, and Kaiden as they talked and laughed. Francisco was shy. He was not acting the way he had when he had been when he did not know that Kaiden was his father and I understood that. It was still a little strange to him. I was going to have to tell Kaiden to have a talk with him about how they were supposed to interact and be comfortable with each other.
“Are you okay?” Lyra asked, coming to stand beside me with two cups of fruit punch in her hands. She handed one of them over to me and looked in the direction I was looking. “Oh,” she said, glancing at me before looking back at them again. “They look happy,” she said.
Harper giggled and tapped Kaiden. “Tag, you’re it!” She yelled and started to run. Kaiden chased after her and Francisco tailed after them, laughing. “I don’t think he’s ever been this excited,” I said quietly. I took a sip of the drink. She let out a sigh and looked at me.
“How does that make you feel?” She asked. “I’m jealous,” I replied with all honesty. There was a burning jealousy in my stomach and it was making me sick.
“He is so happy. I… didn’t know was taking this from him,” I said, forcing back the tears in my eyes. “I didn’t make him as happy as this,” I said, pressing my thumb to my bottom lip.