Chapter 363
I fumbled my words because I was trying to suppress the overwhelming heartache.
At that moment, I realized that Colin was my soul. Without Colin, I’d become a zombie. My love for him had taken root beyond my imagination before I knew it.
Colin held me tightly. His broad hands almost squeezed the life out of me. With reddened eyes, he uttered, “I don’t resent you, babe. I know you did everything for me. Forgive me. I wasn’t strong enough. I failed to give you a sense of security.
“I’m sorry, Lulu. But things weren’t that bad. You should’ve trusted me when I said that I could handle it. What you did shattered my heart.”
He kissed me, and I returned his kiss passionately. The wounds in our mouths reopened, and warm blood rolled down the corners of our lips. The bystanders gasped in horror, but we
paid them no mind.
At that precise moment, we only had each other. We lived in our own world.
He hugged me, creating a corner that blocked out the universe. I snuggled into him as if he were my entire world. We stayed in our little world, kissing and hugging each other deeply.
This could be our final chance to share an intimate moment, so I wanted to indulge myself.
The tears on my face had dried, but the tears in my heart continued to flow like a river. Light would become a foreign concept in my life.
“Colin, I love you. While I might not be with you, you’ll stay in my heart.”
“Babe, I love you. The first time I met you, I told myself I’d marry no one else but you.”
“Don’t, Colin. I don’t want you to wait for me. There are so many women out there. I’ll be happy so long as you’re happy.”
“You silly. Can’t you see it? You are my happiness. Without you, I’ll never be happy.”
I grabbed my heart with my right hand figuratively, held it in my hands, and put it where Colin’s heart was. “Colin, I hereby give you my heart. You’re my refuge, my haven.”
Colin pressed my figurative heart and hand against his chest. He whispered, “Lulu, my heart belongs to you too. It’s yours only. Trust me. I can handle everything.”
I was still smitten with the romantic and intimate moment we were having, so much so that I didn’t give much thought to what Colin meant when he wanted me to trust him that he
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could solve everything.
It wasn’t that I did not trust him. I just felt bad for him. I didn’t want him to be stuck in a position where he had to choose between his lover and his brother.
The door to the emergency room flung wide open. Two nurses pushed the gurney out and yelled, “Felix White’s family, please come here.”
Colin and I separated. With one on the left and another on the right, we walked next to the gurney and entered the ward.
“The patient is alright. He fainted from mental shock. We’ll monitor his situation for a night. If nothing goes wrong, he can be discharged tomorrow morning.” The nurse left after explaining.
Colin and I sat separately next to the bed until late at night.
When the pain became unbearable, it turned into numbness and resignation. Those facing impending doom would experience the same.
Colin was the first to break the silence in the dark. He asked if it was my final decision to cut him off from the whole relationship.
I said I didn’t want to cut him off. But in this messy, three–way relationship, someone had to quit. Otherwise, everyone would get hurt. And I didn’t want him to get hurt.
Colin sniggered. He asked if I’d regret my decision. I fell silent. It wasn’t my intention to do what I had done. And what purpose did regret serve? The problem needed to be solved.