Chapter 41 – The Departure
“I wish there was a way to know you’re in the good old days before you’ve actually left them.“Andy Bernard
Kiya
Odessa didn’t die. I’m disappointed.
00:0:
However, because of her ghastly injuries, she is confined to a hospital bed. For how long? I don’t know. Visiting her at the hospital was out of the question, but I got my news from Raina. According to the doctors, her recovery will be slow, Ariel, her wolf, abandoned her and took her rapid healing ability with her.
We humans rely on our wolves to heal us quickly, especially in battle. Without Ariel, Odessa will heal a little faster than a normal human, but not as fast as a normal werewolf
I can’t say that I feel had for her. Searching for pity was like searching for a needle in a haystack; it was impossible. I felt nothing. In contrast, my happiness soared when I heard about her condition. As f*cked up as it is, she deserved it. Everything.
Odessa made my stay at Zircon Moon hell. It’s hard to find pity for someone who tried to kill me twice, sided with the enemy and ruined friendships. Her malice cost her, but as she fell into madness, she took me with
her.
Her horrid actions were for Neron’s love and attention–a privilege she felt robbed of. While I had no Intention of taking the Alpha from her, Odessa saw me as a threat. A threat needed to be eliminated.
It’s a shame. Sometimes, I think that if life didn’t throw us a curveball, we could’ve been friends. That dream will never come to fruition–it died before it had a chance at life. Odessa was relentless with her pursuits of my death.
But I have no regrets for what I’ve done. Payback’s a bitch, after all. She’s trash and will never be someone’s treasure again. But Selene has her ways of mending.
I have confidence that she’ll know what to do with Odessa, Our fates are ours to choose.
Many heard Odessa’s confession. Exposed in the front yard, her screeches of insanity and hatred carried with it her sins. The heavens heard her own up to all her bullshit. My friends, my parents and Neron heard everything! Our sensitivity to volume picked up her voice, so I have no doubts all of Zircon heard her..
Whether or not there was underlying guilt is not the issue. Her Instability sealed her fate. My assault simply propelled it forward.
However, I won’t be seeing what is to come to her.
Today marks the day that I’m leaving Zircon Moon for good.
There is too much pain for me to handle; too much anger and sadness. The foundation I’ve taken years to strengthen crackled and crumbled underneath my feet, plunging my body and mind into a sea of darkness and mental torment.
I’m drowning and I can’t escape.
To add to my troubles, something bad is brewing inside ine. Dark and destructive. As the minutes pass, I feel my inner beast clawing against its cage, demanding freedom. It’s hungry, wrathful, and bloodthirsty, Linked with me, I also feel myself falling into its violent allure.
Fear, death, and ruin are excellent traits to pull me into evil.
The mark on my neck throbs. It pulses for him and desired bloodbaths. The strongest it has ever been was when I killed Tristan and almost murdered Odessa. It made me feel good. Powerful. Unstoppable.
Unhinged.
Anyone who bore the mark of Zircon, I wanted their death. They were my lambs and I’m the slaughterhouse.
This has to stop. My parents were right this place is not good for me. I’m getting worse; losing myself. I had to get back home to recover and heal. They saw the carnage I committed and were already arranging my visits to see my psychiatrist. As soon as I get home, I’m jumping back into therapy. The fall semester is around the corner, and I rather have this baggage situated than carry it into my junior year.
It’s my only chance of regaining some sense of normalcy in my life.
All my belongings are in two large suitcases and a shoulder bag. Zipping up the last of my bath items, I stood up and looked at what is now my empty room, naked like a newborn minus the necessities. It felt bigger than when I first arrived; as if it already purged itself of my presence.
Time to close out this chapter of my life forever.
Rolling my luggage out of the room, what transpired this morning lingered in my mind. During breakfast, Neron denounced Mikhail and Isalah as pack members. Neither man wanted to be apart from their mates, so they’re following Galen and Sapphire to Garnet Moon. The happiness on my friends‘ faces when they realized their mates are moving with them warmed my heart.
I expected Neron to convince them to stay for the good of Zircon. An Alpha doesn’t let go of his pack. members so easily. Oddly, he accepted their requests without question. Once the denouement ritual was concluded in his office, the two immediately packed what they could in their suitcases. The rest of their items: will be sent to Garnet Moon at a later date.
I entered the foyer, taking a last look around the place. A faint longing enters my heart. This place- this home held joyous and terrible memories, Pains and pleasures. It’s hard to believe I once called this place my own.
Now, I’m ready to burn it out of my mind.
A large passenger van stood near the front steps with my friends and family stuffing their bags and suitcases Inside, almost in a hurry. I chuckle because they want to leave as much as I do.
“Auntie!” Adonis immediately ran up and hug my legs with a flurry of sadness in tow. “Please, don’t go!”
“Donny…” Raina walks up with her husband in tow. Her glassy eyes held undeniable sadness but are masked behind a reprimanding look. “Let your Auntle go. She has to go home.”
“Her home is here, Mommy!” He retorted, squeezing my legs tighter. “It’s not fair! Why does she have to
leave
“Domy, dear,” Glassy green looks up at me in silent pleading. My heart was shattering at his sadness, but I swallowed it downs, putting on a brave face. Don’t bend, Kiya, not even to a child. My palm went to his curly hair, rubbing it lovingly. I love my nephew so much and huts to see him so sad. “I know you want me to stay. but I have to go. I have to be at home to get better.”
“Are you sick?”
I
Cocking my head to the side, I smile down at the little boy. Curiosity is always a child’s cutest trait. “Kind of. I’m not feeling well, but it’s not like how you feel when you get a cold. Staying here won’t help me get better, but I can at my home.”
“But we have medicine here! You can take that, and you can stay!”
“I need a different type of medicine, Adonis, and only my home as It.” Explaining this stuff to a child is harder than it looks. “Donny, I’m not leaving forever,”
“You live so far away. Mommy said so.”
“Your Mom is not wrong.” My palm caressed his cheek, swiftly catchling the tears before they fell, Such a sweet boy; I wanted to take all his sadness away. “I live far away, but that doesn’t mean we can’t talk. If you feel like talking to me, ask your Mommy or Daddy to call me on the phone. It Isn’t the same as me being here, but it’s better than nothing.”
Adonis regarded me with a worried look before falling in resignation, Solfiling, he rubbed his eyes a H! squeezed my legs again. “Okay, I’ll still miss you.”
Kneeling to his height, I dropped my bag and pulled the boy into a light hug. His little head buried itself in my neck, sniffling heavily. Goddess, I promised myself I wouldn’t cry. Adonis earned a place in my heart without effort. “I’ll miss you ton. He good to your Mommy and Daddy, okay?”
“Uh–huh. I love you, Auntle,”
you.
“…I love you too, Donny.”
Standing erect, Raina suddenly drew me into a hug. My body stiffened at her sudden touch, but relaxed into. her warmth. I wasn’t expecting this level of affection from my big sister, but I welcomed It. With her arms wrapped tightly around my form, my head rested on her shoulder as I hugged her back, Ralna’s deep sniffle were heard as we shared a tender moment as sisters, When she pulled back, allent tears coated her cheeks,
“I’m sorry.” She murmured, rubbing my cheek lovingly. “I wish I could’ve done more to help you. I’m an awful sister and I’m so sorry.”
“Raina…” Goodbyes f*cking suck. The shilt always gets me misty–eyed for no reason. Why am I reacting this way? I didn’t want to cry for anyone, especially Ralna. “You’ve done what you can. I’m more f*cked up than I realized.”
“No, you aren’t.” She replied harshly. “You aren’t f*cked up and never were! You’re hurting. I think going home is a good idea. I don’t think there’s any more we can give you. For all we know, we made things worse for you.”
“I know.” My exhale is shaky. “I just…need more help.” Before I kill someone again, that is.
“You need happiness. And it won’t come from here,”
Wow. Itaina has grown so much. My heart stirs at her kindness, but soon stilled in attempts to remain strong and stole. She’s so different from the sister I grew up with–maybe it’s motherhood with a splash of her guilt that changed her.
After giving me her well–wishes, she took Adonis inside, but I didn’t miss the sad wave he gave me. Displaying my best smile, I waved back.
“Thank you for giving Raina a chance, Kiya,” Valerian said to me once his wife was out of earshot. This man was never good at social interaction or expressing his emotions outside of people he’s very close to. Our relationship is like all and water, but we’re making it work, somehow. “And for making my son happy. He’s taken a great liking to you. In your short time here, you made my boy the happiest he’s ever been.”
“I’m glad.” I offer him a small smile. “He’s precious. Just don’t let him cause you too much trouble.”
“We’ll see. He’s an adventurous lad.” Valerian chuckled with his eyes sparkling in pride. We haven’t talked much, but I know Adonis is his pride and joy. He loves him. “I know we never connected, but I wish you well. You’re my family too, and I want you happy.”
My smile is small. “Thank you, Valerian.”
Kwame and Lorelai came not too long after, wishing me a safe ride home, The Gammas are the few people I trust with my heart, and it meant a lot to see Kwame before I left. Adamah has the best big brother, Lorelai, mellow and sweet, rubs her pregnant belly affectionately, ruminating on her future as a mother.
“I think your child is going to be a girl.” I smile. “Too much testosterone here. There needs to be a balance of
the sexes.”
“Ah, I agree,” She chuckled while Kwame pouted playfully. He’s adorable.
“I’m still convinced that our first child will be a boy, I need a son to bond with!”
“Never doubt a mother’s intuition! Just like I know that mayonnaise and pickles are a good food combination.”
Kwame and 1 gagged in unison. Pregnant woman cravings are evil. If I ever get pregnant, goddess help me.
After a few laughs, the three of us exchanged hugs before they departed back into the pack house. Part of me wishes I could be here for the birth of the new Gamma, but it’s impossible. Hopefully, Omar and Violet can send me some photos of their grandchild when they’re born.
There wasn’t much time left before my departure. Walking to the van, I packed my suitcase into the trunk with case, patting it in. Some of my pup trainees came up and wished me and my friends a safe ride home. I’m grateful that Kwame and Valerian are taking over all the training sessions of both the adult wolves and pups They’ll select the new Deltas after reviewing the final progress reports we provided them with Neron’s. approval.
But it doesn’t ease the pain of missing my students. They’ve blossomed so much, and it saddens me I won’t see them at their full potential.
I’ll miss everything. Can’t win them all, I guess.
Chapter 1: The Departure
As the last of my bags are in the van, the thick aroma of ginger and sandalwood wafted into my nose, igniting a foreign feeling in me. Immediately, my head turned behind to see Neron lingering at the front steps, gazing at our van with well–disguised sadness.
He looked like he wanted to say something but decided against it at the last second.
Internally, I debated whether to go up to him for the final time, or just hop into the fan and high–tail out of
Nevada.
I went to him.