Tristan
It’s so peaceful here. So much green, so much space, clear blue skies, and the lake in front of me. The air is so fresh, and I never want to leave. “You have to leave, Trist.”
“Not without you.” I turn my eyes to my twin sister, sitting beside me on a fallen log beside the lake.
The moment I entered this place, Starr was waiting for me. She ran into my arms, and we held each other tight. The relief inside was unexplainable. I don’t know why we’re both in white, but we are. My mind is a little jumbled about how I got here. But I don’t care how I got here; all I care about is that I’m with my sister.
“You can’t stay here, Tristan.”
“I won’t leave you, Starr.”
“You don’t belong here. You’re not dead, Trist.”
“Nor are you. So why I have got to go, and you stay.”
“Because I don’t know how to find my way home, Tristan. I don’t know how to find my way home.” Tears fall from Starr’s eyes, breaking my heart.
I wrap my arm around her shoulders and bring her head against mine. “We’ll find our way home, Starr. I won’t leave you here alone, I promise.”
“Look over there.” Starr points to the left.
Two small children around six years of age chase each other. Laughter falls from their lips as two identical teenagers run after them, pretending to be monsters and making the small kids laugh louder.
“Do you remember that day, Tristan?”
I nod.
I remember every moment of our time together. Wherever we are now, scenes from our past keep flashing before our eyes. We’ve already seen so much, and it seems the visions aren’t going to end any time soon.
‘Quick, Tristan!’ Six-year-old Starr yells while grabbing six-year-old me’s hand. ‘We must hide from the evil troll twins!’
‘Did you just call us evil troll twins? She just called us evil troll twins, Throin!
‘You know what that means, Tane?’
‘Yeah, these evil troll twins are gonna gobble the munchkin twins up!’
Starr and I laugh at sixteen-year-old Thorin and Tane as they grab our six-year-old selves and pretend to eat us.
“I didn’t realize how often they played with us.”
“Starr, they tormented us more than played with us.”
“Yeah, but they loved us.”
“They still do.”
The scene fades, and Starr and I get out of our seats.
“Look,” Starr points, and we’re suddenly inside the castle. Mom and Dad’s bedroom, to be exact.
I smile at Mom, sitting up in bed, holding a newborn Esme in her arms. Dad is sitting beside Mom with his arm wrapped around her shoulders. Thane, Theo, Isla, Tyler, Thorin, and Tane are all standing near the bed, smiling. Seven-year-old Starr and I are on the bed, staring at the baby.
I remember this moment like it was yesterday. After a complicated labor, Mom gave birth during the night, and we’d yet to meet the baby. Thane had woken us early in the morning and brought us to meet our new baby sister. ‘What’s her name?’ Starr asked.
‘Her name is Esme Willow Moira Knight.
‘She’s small. I chuckle at my seven-year-old self’s words.
‘That’s because she’s brand new.’ Dad smiles. ‘We have a very important job for the two of you!
‘Job?!’ Starr screeches. “But we can’t work; we’re only seven!’
Everyone in the room laughs, and Dad shakes his head with a smile on his face. ‘No, my sweet girl. This job is to take care of your baby sister. Do you think you can do that?’ ‘But we’re only little.
‘Yes, Tristan, you are little. But the two of you won’t be little forever. This little girl is going to look up to you, and you’ll be able to teach her so many wonderful things!
I smile at the memory of Dad handing Starr the baby and me kissing her head.
That scene fades, and others flit in and out. We see ourselves pulling pranks on Thorin and Tane, their retaliation, Esme growing up, and us starting high school. We see our many ups and downs in life, Thane and Theo bringing Lyric and Harmony home and the day Esme’s bullies were released from the dungeons.
Just leave it, Starr.’ ‘I will not!’
I remember rolling my eyes as Starr grabbed Ren’s arm and pinned her against the wall beside the bakery in town. I sighed because we didn’t need to do this, but Starr was angry that Ren was walking around town without a care in the world. ‘What do you want, Starr?’
Starr growled. ‘Shut the fu.ck up and listen. You can swan around acting like you’re a saint all you want. But we all know what you really are. I don’t give a damn how long you were in that dungeon; it wasn’t long enough. Do you have any idea the damage you’ve done to my sister’s mind? Do you even care?’
‘I know what I did, Starr. I had enough time in that hole to think about it. I shouldn’t have done what I did, and I honestly am sorry, Starr. I just want to live my life. Please let me go!
I watch as past Starr releases her hold on Ren and steps back. ‘Just stay away from my sister. I hear you’ve so much as looked at Esme, and I’ll kill you. Do you understand?’ ‘Yes’
Starr tips her head. ‘Leave. Ren scurries away!
‘You’re scary, do you know that?’
I watch past Starr laugh before hugging my past self.
Again, scenes flit in and out. Every holiday, birthday, and special event in our lives. Nothing is in sequence, but all of it shows how close Starr and I have always been.
We see when Starr comes to me with her plan to help Emori. All of the pain Emori went through flashes in front of our eyes and the moment I rescued Emori from that dungeon.
‘Who are you?’ Emori mumbles as I carry her to my uncle’s cabin. I was covered from head to toe in black at this point, the mask still in place. ‘Where are you taking me?’ I don’t answer her questions.
I get Emori to the cabin and lay her on the old couch, where Starr fusses over her. “Emori, I’m sorry. We got you out as soon as we could.
‘Why are you helping me?’
‘Because I know you didn’t hurt Thane for any other reason than to help him.’
‘Who are you? Emori asks me again. I remove my hood and mask, and she gasps. ‘You look like him.
‘Him who?’ Starr presses, but Emori falls asleep without answering.
We see the moment Thane called us to his office and demanded we tell him how we combined our powers. Starr and I had been able to do that since we were thirteen, though we kept it to ourselves. It happened by accident while we were climbing trees in the forest. I fell from a tree, Starr jumped with me, and our powers joined, saving us from a nasty accident. We became almost invincible once we’d trained ourselves to combine on demand.
Thane wasn’t happy with us, not at all. But Tyler burst into the room and hugged us, telling us thank you and that he loved us. Tyler had never hugged me before, but I loved it.
The scene fades and returns with me running to my room on the day of the coronation. Lyric had just found and spoken to me about Brody. I was hurt and couldn’t take that he didn’t want me. Of course, Starr felt my pain and followed me.
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ My past self spins on the spot and comes face to face with Starr. “Tristan,’
‘Don’t, please.’ Starr wrapped her arms around me and held me while I cried. ‘He doesn’t want me. I’m not good enough!’
Seeing myself like that churns my stomach. I look so pathetic!
‘You are good enough, Trist. Brody is just shocked, is all. He’ll come around, but the question will be, do you want him to, and will you forgive him?’
Starr and I talked until she left for the Vampire Kingdom. We’d never been apart before, and I didn’t know how to cope without her.
Even more, scenes flash in front of us-Starr’s time with Esme at Harrington Castle. Then I see the nightmares Astro forced into Starr’s head, how she tried to fight them, but they were too much. He stands in front of her now, a smirk on his face. He’s not really there; it’s just a dream, but I can feel Starr’s fear.
‘I will make a deal with you, Lycan. Take Lyric’s place, and all will be well.
‘If I willingly go with you, you’ll leave my family alone?’
‘Yes.’
“Did you believe him?”
“No,” Starr clutches my hand. “I didn’t believe a word he said. But something compelled me to agree, even though I didn’t want to. I knew he’d use me to get to Lyric, and I couldn’t stop him!
I can’t watch the scene now in front of me. Starr’s screams rip through me. My heart hammers inside my chest, and though I know this is the past, I want to kill Astro!
Then I hear my own screams. The screams that fell from me when I felt Starr’s light go out.
“Why are we seeing all of this, Starr?”
“Look.” I force myself to turn and look at what Starr is pointing at.
I take a shuddering breath when I see Esme sneak into my room. No one else is in there, so they must have been outside. My baby sister climbs onto my bed and lies beside me, taking my hand in her own. I’m asleep, but this must be resent. ‘Tristan, please don’t leave me as well. I don’t want you to go. I miss Starr; she went to heaven without me. If you go, I want to go too.
“Oh, Goddess!”
“Esme needs you, Tristan. They all do. I can’t be with them yet, but you can.”
“How am I supposed to be there without you?”
Starr turns to face me and smiles. “It won’t be forever, Tristan. I will find my way back to you.” With my hands in hers, Starr kisses my knuckles. “I don’t know how long it will take but don’t give up hope. Never give up hope, Tristan.”
“I don’t want to be there without you, Starr. Let me stay here with you. We’ll find our way back together.”
“No,” Starr shakes her head. “You don’t belong here, Tristan.”
“Nor do you!”
“I know that, Trist. But I can’t return yet, no matter how much I may want to. My body is out there somewhere, and my spirit has to find it before I can come home. I need you to take care of Esme. If you don’t wake up, I’m scared of what she’ll do to be with us. Please, Trist.”
‘Please wake up,’ I gasp and look around, trying to find the voice, but there’s no one around. The voice is coming from somewhere that isn’t here. It’s all around us. ‘I know I said some horrible things that were uncalled for, and I’m sorry. I also know you’re in immense pain after losing Starr. But your family needs you, Tristan.
“He’s calling for you. Brody needs you.”
“He doesn’t want me, Starr.”
“Then why is he with you right now, begging you to wake up? Go home, Tristan. It’s your choice whether or not to forgive Brody. Take care of Esme for me until I can be with you both again. Be strong, and never give up hope that I’ll be home one day.”
I pull Starr into my arms and hold her tight. I don’t want to let go, but I know she’s right. I have to return and find her. Starr is out there somewhere, and I will keep going until she’s home.
“I’ll never give up searching for you, Starr. I will find you and bring you home, and I will take care of Esme until you return, I promise.”
“I love you so much, Tristan. Not just my brother but my best friend. Now one will ever mean to me what you do.”
“Ditto. I love you, too, Starr, always and forever. Keep that in your heart until you’re home again.”
“Always and forever.” Starr’s voice fades, and life fills my sleeping body once more.
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