Megan 7- Crying and cleaning
Once we’re off the phone Darrien pushes me towards his bathroom.
“You’ll feel better when you’re clean.” He promises. I don’t think a shower is going to be enough to make me feel clean again. But I do as he says because it’s not like I have a better plan. I stand under the hot water and cry my eyes out for a good half hour as the blood washes down the drain. I borrow some of Darrien’s stupid guy 2 in 1 shampoo/conditioner stuff that is probably terrible for my hair but at least it gets the blood out. I also use some of his b*dy wash and I find it comforting and familiar. Once my eyes are burning from the tears, I force myself to stop crying and turn off the water. I look at myself in the little mirror he has in here and realise that my eye makeup didn’t come off in the shower and has just run down. my face giving me panda eyes. This morning I felt beautiful. Now I just feel disgusting and broken. I search for something to clean my face, but all I can find is a single towel that Darrien left behind for me. I wrap myself in it and Darrien gently taps on the door.
“Megan? I have something for you to wear.” He calls out.
“Okay. Come in.” I answer. My voice is hoarse from crying and he must be able to hear it. I hate crying in front of people. He opens the door cautiously and steps inside. He hands me a pile of clothes.
“They’re mine so they won’t fit you, but it’s better than nothing. We can grab something of yours later.” He says softly. I nod and take the clothes, clutching them to my chest. He takes in my appearance and the makeup running down my face.
“Let me help you with that.” He gestures for me to sit on the closed toilet and I do, still clutching the clothes to myself. He rummages through a cupboard I wasn’t brave enough to open and pulls out a face washer. He dampens it and then kneels on the wet floor in front of me. He carefully and methodically wipes the makeup from my face before dropping the face washer into the sink. I just sit there, unmoving, not sure what to do with myself.
“I’ll let you get dressed.” He steps out, closing the door behind himself. I get to my feet and look at the clothes he left me. An oversized shirt and a pair of track pants with a tie at the waist. I pull the tie tight and roll up the pants a little so I won’t trip over them and slip the
I look so small in his clothes and I feel very exposed without underwear. My hair is dripping down my back but I can’t be bothered to even towel it off. I just leave it. I step into
shirt
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the living room and Darrien hands me a hot chocolate that he had ready and waiting.
“Here, relax for a minute while I clean up. I’ll be right back. Call if you need something.” He insists. I nod and he steps into the bathroom with an armful of clothing. He showers in under two minutes and when he emerges he’s dressed similarly to me, but his clothes actually fit
him.
I’m sitting on the couch and sipping at my drink slowly. Darrien sinks into the couch beside me, holding a towel and a brush.
“May 1?” He asks. I nod slowly and he adjusts so that he can reach me better. He carefully squeezes the water out of my hair and pats it dry so that it’s no longer dripping. Then he carefully sorts through my hair with the brush. I pulled out all the pins in the shower, but there was teasing in my hair and his crappy hair products didn’t do much to help that situation. Once my hair is tidied, he just keeps brushing it, I relax into the feeling and before I know it, there are tears running down my cheeks again. I feel awful. I killed someone, and yet Darrien is being so careful with me. I’m not sure I deserve his care. He eventually breaks
the silence.
“I’m sorry.” He says, his voice breaking. I frown.
“What for?” I ask, confused.
–
save
“I should have stopped him. You only stepped in because I turned my back.” He ashamed. I flash back to that moment. Tristan leapt at Darrien and I was moving before I could think. I didn’t hesitate. Didn’t even blink. I just knew I had to protect Darrien, like he
protects me.
“It’s not your fault. I… I don’t regret it.” I admit. That might be the worst part of this. I can’t imagine making any other decision at that moment. Darrien sighs, drops the brush and wordlessly wraps an arm over my shoulder, tipping me into his side.
“Thank you
for protecting me then.” He says instead. I can accept that. The one bright side of this situation. He didn’t get hurt.
We spend a few hours at his place. Darrien gives me time to work through my thoughts and he stays there, sitting with me while I cry it out. Darrien occasionally checks his phone,
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communicating with someone via text. I have no idea who, honestly I don’t have the energy
to care. He does take a phone call from Shaun and I listen in.
“Hey Shaun. I’m here with Megan.” Darrien answers the phone.
“Oh sh- I mean. Yeah, okay. Well as you asked we’re taking care of everything. I was just wondering if you knew where our Alpha has gone? No one has heard from him.” Shaun explains. I can’t help but snort a laugh. It sounds a little crazy and almost more like a sob, but it is a laugh. I answer for Darrien, snatching the phone from him.
“My brother is with Ryann. They’ve sorted things out and he took her home.” I tell him.
“Right. Well in that case I’ll tell everyone to stop looking. We won’t try to call him again unless it’s an emergency. I’m not getting involved in that situation.” Shaun sounds deadly
serious.
“That would be wise.” I answer dryly. Darrien gestures that he wants the phone back and I
hand it to him.
“Did you guys take care of everything I asked for?” Darrien says vaguely.
“Yes. All taken care of. If she needs anything else, please let us know.” Shaun offers before hanging up. She? I suppose he means me. They must be taking care of Tristan’s b*dy and dealing with the police. I won’t be in any trouble. Bellamy is the Alpha so he’s the one responsible for my actions anyway.
“We should get you home and in some proper clothes.” Darrien tells me gently. Huh, I don’t know that I want to go back, but I guess I can’t avoid the place forever. Although I have to say I don’t mind wearing Darrien’s stuff. It’s comfortable, although I could use underwear.
I reluctantly let Darrien walk me home and watch as he unlocks the front door with his key. I’m not sure I want to go in, there is wedding stuff everywhere, it will hurt. But when we head inside I’m surprised to see the house is tidy, not a single sign of tulle or invitations anywhere. What happened? Who cleaned this up? Where did it all go? I look at Darrien, seeking answers. He shrugs uncomfortably.
“I loaned Rio my key while you were in the shower and had her come and clear up anything
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D93% 0111:59
obvious. I thought it might make it more comfortable for you. She cleared your room too so you can sleep if you want. I’m sorry if that was overstepping, I know Alpha Kane doesn’t allow people upstairs… But I thought that given the circumstances it might be a good idea.” He explains awkwardly. I stare at my feet.
“Did… did she throw it all away?” I ask, not sure what answer I’m looking for. I want the stuff gone… but also I spent a lot of time choosing it and I value it a lot. I can’t imagine never getting to wear the dress I chose.
“No, it’s all been moved into one of the guest rooms upstairs. When you’re ready to go. through it, it will be there. But that’s not a job for today. I can help when you need it… that is if you want. Or maybe Ryann would be a better person to assist with that. I don’t know.” He offers. I can tell he is trying to make everything better for me and I appreciate the effort. If only it was as easy as hiding everything away. Still, at least for now I think that’s what I have to do. Push everything to the back of my mind and just carry on. Right now. I think chocolate is a good idea.
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