Chapter 61
Fear gripped my heart and I prayed that it wasn’t Kieran’s mother. I cast a backward glanced at the boy who had no idea. what was going on and his grieving grandmother. The only thing keeping me grounded was Jaxon’s’ arms around me and even with that, I threatened to topple over. The smell of smoke had infiltrated my nose and I was unsure whether anything would be able to get it out.
The chief of the fire department went to check out the body and I knew that Jaxon wanted to go to but he was determined to stay by my side during the entire ordeal so Aiden went to check it out. When he got back, he had a grimace on his face and there was something else there, something that looked like guilt but I knew it was misplaced because he had as much fault in this as Jaxon did- none.
“That one was terrible,” Aiden said more to Jaxon than me. “She had almost gotten out but she was trapped under some debris. “She died from the smoke. I can’t imagine how her family is going to feel.”
“Were you able to get an idea of what she was wearing?”
Aiden turned to me as if I asked the most absurd question but I needed to know. I needed to know if it was her and how I
1 was going to break the news to the family. I knew there was someone in charge of doing that but I felt somehow responsible for them. I felt they deserved to hear it from me and not from a trained soldier who wouldn’t even share in their pain or offer appropriate sympathy.
“She was burnt badly but because most of her was trapped, not every part of her got burnt if that makes any sense. She was wearing some sort of fuzzy pink slippers.”
My world turned on its axis and bile rushed up my throat. I swallowed down the urge to projectile vomit all over the place. I tried to breathe through my nose but it only seemed to make things worse. The smoke and the despair reminded me that these were families that had been completely ripped apart and it was my fault. These were families that were completely ruined and altered and it was all because I would not go back to Noxian
“Freya,” I didn’t realize Jaxon had turned me to face him and was staring down at me in concern. “Are you okay?”
I swayed in his hold but nodded. I could tell he didn’t believe me but I didn’t care in that moment. I looked around for Kieran and his grandmother and I caught their eye over Jaxon’s shoulder. His grandmother must have seen something in my eyes because tears began to stream down her face. I wanted to go to her and offer my sympathies, I wanted to tell her that everything would be alright but my feet would not move.
I was drowning in an ocean of my guilt, I was being tossed around by the waves and I felt like my presence would only make it worse so I forced myself to look away from her and back at Jaxon. Jaxon’s eyes had never left mine but this time they followed my line of sight to Kieran and understanding filled his gaze.
“Is that her family?” he asked and I nodded. “Do you want to go talk to them?”
I hesitated but Jaxon knew what to do because he squeezed my hand tightly in his and walked us over to them. People seemed to automatically clear the way for us and I knew it was because of Jaxon, When we got there, the grandmother stood up straighter despite her grief and bowed to Jaxon
“I am sorry for your loss,” he said to her and she offered him a watery smile. “If there is anything that we can do to make sure that you and your grandson are fine then-”
“I need you to make sure he gets into a good home,” she said and my brows furrowed.
Even Jaxon looked confused and she must have seen the confusion on our faces because she gestured for us to go to a more private place to talk. She Jeft Kieran in the hands of the other grieving neighbors and Jaxon led us towards some trees where we had a semblance of privacy and we turned back to her.
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< 11:16 Sat, May 18 M Chapter 61 “I don’t live here normally, Lcame to visit my daughter. I’m not a lycan like she is and her father didn’t want to tie his he to mine. Granted he died a while ago in a rogue attack. I’m not going to live longer and I want Kieran to live without the burden of watching another person die.” My heart cut for the little boy whose life had been completely upended forever. He would never get to see his mother or grandmother again. I knew what that could do to a child and even though it was out of my control. I nodded. “We will do everything we can.” “Thank you,” she whispered in a broken voice. “I can leave knowing that he will be in good hands.” you,” She hesitated before her next action but she threw her hands around my neck. I was shocked by her display of affection but I embraced her regardless. She pulled back after a second, apologized for her behavior and rushed back to Kieran. I stood there stunned for a second then turned to Jaxon. “You can’t keep that promise,” he told me. You can try but at the end of the day you can’t know if he is with a good family. People are good at pretense, you of all people should know that “I know, but I can try my best to make sure that he has a good life. He deserves that from me. All of this was my fault and the least I can do is to make it right.” “It isn’t your fault, Freya. All of this is Noxian’s. It is not your fault that he is a narcissist. It is not your fault that he is delusional and refuses to take no for an answer,” “Maybe, but it is my fault that he targeted this pack. He wanted to get back at me for refusing him and he did.” Jaxon sighed and ran his free hand through his hair. “Come, we have to finish up with the fire fighters and go home.” “Is this how it is going to be?” I asked Jaxon as we made our way towards the fire fighters. “Is it going to attack after attack until we give up? Isn’t there something we can do.” “If we can prove that Noxian set this then we can end this. The lycan council has a rule against unprovoked attacks on werewolf packs. We are more powerful than them and they see it as annihilation instead of an attack. Unless we can prove that he did this, then it might just be like this.” 1 squeezed my eyes shut because I didn’t think I could handle any more of this. No more tears, no more fires, I couldn’t do it. Even though we were in public, Jaxon pulled me into his side and pressed a kiss to my temple. His lips lingered there and I knew it was his way of saying without using the words that he was there for me and I appreciated that. “We’ll find proof,” he mumbled under his breath but I wasn’t sure if he was trying to assure me or himself. It took us another half an hour to finish up with the fire department and while we drove home, all I could think about was getting into the shower and washing off every smell of smoke from my body. I hoped that getting the smell out would take away the memories but even I knew how fantastical that was. As soon as we got into the palace, Kiara came barreling towards us. In my thoughts, I had completely forgotten that we sent her home earlier and she was waiting for us. My daughter was a bright light in my otherwise dark day and I didn’t want to stain her with what I had experienced so I took a step back from her. Why d do you smell weird?” she asked with a wrinkle of her nose and it was Jaxon who answered. “It’s called smoke, princess. It’ll go off once mummy and I take baths,” Jaxon turned to me. “You should I’ll take care of I thanked him for the escape and practically ran into our room stripped off the clothes and as I stared at them, I knew I wanted nothing to do with them anymore so instead of dropping them into the laundry basket, I threw them directly into 2/ KIPS VIRTUAL ADMISSIONS OPEN Prepare for Medical, Engineering. C$ & Business Entrance Tests 17+LMS 北 FEATURES O ENROLL NOW! < 11:16 Sat, May 18 M. Chapter 61 the bin. I made my way into the bathroom and stood directly under the blazing hot water in the shower. 40% I kept my eyes open because whenever I closed them, I would see Kieran and his grandmother, I would see the house and I would smell the smoke as if I was hack there. I wanted the smell off so I scrubbed my skin until it was raw and red but the smell lingered. Nothing I tried would take it away. I even used Jaxon’s body wash in the hopes that it would work but it didn’t. 1 reluctantly got out of the shower because I knew nothing would help and draped myself in Jaxon’s robe. It was white and fluffy and having his scent around me was enough to keep the shoke at bay temporarily. It worked until I got into the room and Jaxon walked in. He hadn’t taken a shower yet so the smell of smoke was still very prominent on his body. As soon as he walked in, the smell hit me face first and bile crawled up my throat, This time, I couldn’t stop it and I rushed info the bathroom to pake out my guts. Jaxon rushed over to me and he wanted to help me lift my hair but having him around me would have only made it worse in that moment so I pushed him away. I saw the confusion and hurt in his eyes and he made a step closer but I held out a hand to stop him. “It’s the smell, I managed out and understanding filled his eyes. Even though it hurt him to do so, he stood a few feet away from me until I was done. I brushed my teeth to get the smell of vomit out while Javon made his way into the shower. I finished first and made my way back into the room. I couldn’t bring myself to change out of his robe so I sat up against the headboard like that. Jaxon returned from the bathroom a few minutes later and he took my cue by dumping his clothes into the bin. He changed into a fresh pair of slacks and a button up shirt but instead of leaving the room, he made his way over to the bed and pulled me into his chest. “You have to work it wasn’t a question. “Yeah, but you’re more important; and I need to make sure that you’re fine first.”|| 田 SEND GIFT KIPS VIRTUAL ୦ COMMENT ADMISSIONS OPEN Prepare for Medical Engineering. C$ & Business Entrance Tests 17+LMSI